Neonixehertz.

28.6.07

I'd just like to start by saying that I updated the blog with another post below this one, so check it out.

The reason for this post is that I'm thinking of trying it out...

Not so long ago during ODAC, one of my friends talked to me about her ideal guy. She said, "it's you..."

Alright, just kidding :)

Anyway, what she really mentioned was about how he would be like, and she described how so very committed she would be to him once they got together...

Wait a sec. This got me thinking...I used to have the same idea of how a relationship, at this particular teenage stage, should be like. Last time I thought well, if both the guy and the girl were extremely sure they liked each other for who each of them really are, they could go steady.

And yeahh, it would require commitment to get into a relationship...but what if I didn't want to be committed? 'Cause the truth is you never know who you'd meet in future and placing your all your hopes on one person, so early in life is just ridiculous. Even if all goes well, what if you meet someone new, start to like him/her and feel sort of split between him/her and old boyfriend/girlfriend?

I mean the possibilities of who you end up with are endless. You could meet someone new in any point of your life, even overseas. You could even split up with your old girlfriend and meet her again 10 years later and, with changed/matured personalities, end up dating each other all the way to marriage. Hey, you could even end up marrying someone you used to hate/argue with! Well you get the idea.

So anyway, let's say I'm interested in a girl and she's interested in me and I date her, but can I do it without getting into a relationship...could I do it for fun? Could we just like each other to some extent but stay as friends? It could work out between us but the thing is, I wanna keep my options open. I think that's what dating is supposed to be like but I'm not certain if that's how other people see it or if they'd agree with me. There probably are people who do this but most of the time when I see couples, they're the sort that wanna give "the rest of their life together" a try.

For my case, I just wanna get to know the person and have fun. Really. Somehow I think it'd be cool to have this kinda non-serious relationship. At the same time both she and I could choose to date other people and neither of us have to hide it. Instead of a committed girlfriend, think of it as "good friend with some aspect of romance". You could call it a "dating" status, though my idea of it is less serious.

So I think my problem now is, how do I explain that to a girl? I have a feeling she might end up feeling confused. I'm not trying to be a playboy here, my point is that one should not be afraid of trying it out with new people.

For this reason I think it's disgusting how I get those chain-letters that tell you to keep loving your boyfriend/girlfriend and don't ever let him/her go. What made you jump to the conclusion that you're gonna spend the rest of your life with that girlfriend in the first place? Don't you wanna get to know more people before making a final decision? Not letting go is being selfish. Not only that, the more people you've dated, the better you know about your own preferences. Besides, people change.

I don't mind if people feel bad after breaking up, what I do mind is these e-mails which give horrible advice. Don't let him/her go? Who are you kidding? This is like deceiving the dear youth to believe that it's bad to break up and you should always try to stay in you relationship. Someone really heartbroken must have typed those dumb letters. Worse still, someone without any experiance.

I sure hope the general view is not like those in the chain-letters. Maybe I could propose this as a debate-topic. In the meantime, wish me luck :p

Posted By Imran at 8:18 AM